The Struggles Of A Perfectionist

Recently I stumbled upon an article from The Haute Mess called The Not-So-Pretty-Behind The Scenes: Fashion Blogging Confession. I couldn’t relate to this post more. I really wanted this summer to be dedicated to accomplishing my goals. I’m very happy that I finally started the blog that I’ve always wanted to. I’m so grateful for all the feed back  I have received from everyone who reads the blog. I’m always looking for ways to improve the blog and make the posts as best as they can be. 

I was so overwhelmed when I realized how many bloggers there actually are. I wasn’t sure if I was “blogging properly.” All I knew was that I wanted the content on my blog to be good. I’m all for supporting other bloggers out there, because it’s scary putting yourself out there, but it’s wonderful when people are telling you that you are inspiring them.

Even though I am getting all this positive feedback I still doubt myself. Don’t get me wrong I’m fabulous, but I do get insecure about myself. I compare myself to others too often and I feel very insecure about myself.  Sometimes I don’t even mean to compare myself to others, it just happens subconsciously. I’ve realized that the perfectionist in me is a trait that has been passed down to me from my mother.However, I’m slowly learning how to be content with myself and everything that I do.

 Here are some of the issues I struggle with being being a perfectionist :

FEELING INSECURE

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Being  somebody who is passionate about fashion I want to share my advice on how to style.  So, I got a photographers help to shoot outfits. However, once I actually started doing photo shoots I just became a hundred times more insecure about myself.  The photographer would take over 200 photos and I would only life three of them. I wanted the photos to come out artsy and candid looking like other bloggers. Instead I looked awkward and I realized I have a hunch back.  I became very critical of myself and I needed to gain back my confidence. There is nothing more sexier than confidence.

DOUBTING YOURSELF

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In order to have a successful blog you need to post daily, but I don’t want to post just anything. I want the content of my blog too be good. So every week I start a couple of drafts, but not all of them get posted. I only post the one I think is good enough for my readers to read. Sometimes I wonder if all my posts and photos look professional, but if I continue to question everything I do I would never have anything to post.

COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS

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Writing blog posts is only one component of running a blog, obviously the aesthetic of your blog is an important component as well. I know in order to get the site to look good as possible that may require some money, but as of now I’m trying to make it look as good as I can with what I have. Looking at other blogs made me want to make mine look as perfect as possible. However, in reality it’s going take some time to look like I want to. I need to learn how to be content with what I have, because looking back at my posts it’s not as bad as I think.

HOW TO OVERCOME THE INNER PERFECTIONIST IN YOU

Being perfect isn’t important, being a better you is

While trying to gain my confidence back I came across two amazing articles. The first article is about the queen of Harry Potter J.K Rowling, sharing her words of wisdom with the world. The article is called How JK Rowling helped me stop wishing to be the prettiest one The article is about the pressure to look perfect and how a quote from J.K Rowling helped her stop wishing she was the prettiest one. J.K Rowling said, 

“I’ve got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don’t want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.”

She couldn’t be more right. We shouldn’t always focus on looking perfect, but being the best person we can be. It shouldn’t matter if they are more prettier people in the world because if you’re striving to be the best person you can be than that is all you need to feel beautiful about yourself (easier said than done of course.)

You don’t need to be perfect to be beautiful

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I included my struggle of trying to take the “perfect,” selfie, because I’ve realized I don’t need to look perfect in order to be considered pretty. Selfies are a form of self-love not self obsession. I read this article about how new research is suggesting that selfies are more empowering than we think. The article explains how the selfie is becoming a way for women to control how others perceive them. People in society view the act of taking selfies as a narcissist quality, but it’s really become a way for women to strive away from the male’s gaze and the concept of women as objects. I think selfie’s are just somebody realizing that they’re beautiful and that they don’t need somebody else to tell them they are. So who cares if you’re getting a judging glare from somebody, take that selfie girl.

Gaining Your Confidence Back

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Image via Seventeen

Recently, I stumbled upon this amazing project called the Pep Talk Generator. Pep Talk Generator was created by the owners of babevibes.com.  The purpose of the Pep Talk Generator is to give advice and support for those that need a reminder not to give up.  

It couldn’t be more perfect for those moments in life where one is doubting themselves. I’ve realized that striving for perfection is a waste of time. 

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What I really should be striving for is happiness. GIF via Wifflegif

Feature Image via: Pinterest